plotdevised | [Serpentine Horizon] Inbox

[oh, this is not the conversation he was expecting to have?

but she has his attention]

I did need to work out my frustration, somehow. And I hoped you would understand, but that didn't work.

[ she seems to struggle for a moment-- at least her honesty objective is being triggered some-- before just blurting out, ]

On top of other things, like effects from the drinking game-- Kim Dokja rejected me for some shiny new boy of his and yeah. Maybe I'm a little fucking bitter about it. I think I have a right to be upset, after everything.

[seems surprised? confused?? for all of two seconds, before he goes back to his usual neutral-angy expression.

not saying anything, though.]

[ she works her jaw for a moment, but it's less trying to hold in anger and more trying to work out what else to say. but eventually her shoulders slump a little. ]

I don't really know what to think. Or how to feel. If he's happy, then-- of course I'm happy for him. Any of us would be. Maybe it's the stress getting to me, or the lack of real sleep, or being in new scenarios again, but I just can't help thinking that if anybody, it should have been you.

[ a pause. ]

... or us.

[ok this time the confusion intensifies and does not leave his face]

Not me. Do not involve me in this.

Shut the fuck up? I'm not going to sit here and play not-it over how we feel about him.

I'm not involving anyone in anything that isn't already there, anyway. I just wanted to explain what happened. That's all.

Thank you for the explanation, but none of this "is already there" for me and I would appreciate you not assuming otherwise.

[ stares at him in complete disbelief for a moment before looking away. ]

... whatever. Just forget it, it doesn't fucking matter.

Evidently it matters a lot, now that we're out here discussing it, but I'm not sure what I can say that could be comforting in these circumstances.

Kim Dokja is a pain.

[ just... slowly sits down. even if she wasn't just physically exhausted after today this is getting exhausting in general. ]

I'm not looking for comfort.

[ a pause. ]

Not really, anyway. ... It's pathetic, but there's not many people I can talk to in this place.

[watches her, then looks at the pond again...]

I can listen.

[ she pulls up her knees to lean her cheek against them, and watches him for a few seconds before closing her eyes. ]

... Yeah.

[ It's a bit awkward, but eventually she does manage to mumble a small "thanks." ]

Edited 2022-07-21 19:50 (UTC)